Currently (i mean friday when i actually wrote this), I’m sat in a car with my family travelling to Luton for a wedding.
I hate weddings. It’s never like in the movies when you go to a wedding and there’s this really cute guy and you end up dancing and making out and then the night gets a little more interesting. No. There is never anyone my age, the food is always this posh stuff that you have no idea whether it’s edible or not and then there’s the awkward dance/disco thing after a lengthy service and freaky food where you all kind of sit awkwardly around the edge of the dance floor and listen to the shitty music selection that people with no taste have put together. There’s also the whole waiting around for hours between the vows and the wedding breakfast which makes you so hungry you only have two options; starve or resort to cannibalism and eat the bride’s mother.
More disadvantages include…..
- being stuck in the car with your family for 5 hours
- having to share a hotel room with your family
- having absolutely everyone disregard the rules of privacy and personal space
- having your parents constantly ask why you insist on getting changed in the bathroom
- wearing a dress and having to look presentable
- being separated from the internet (apparently its rude to take your macbook to a wedding?)
- having no one to talk to for several hours
- not being able to watch Breaking Bad or Supernatural
- most of the time you don’t even know the people being married
I have been to only one wedding about which I could say was a good wedding. This was my mum’s cousin’s wedding.
Things that made it good……
- began later in the day so I could sleep in
- service was short
- during the wait there was loads of cake and drink and snacks and I didn’t go hungry (for a change)
- they put out loads of games like giant jenga and monopoly during the wait
- it was held at this awesome business school/castle which you could explore
- for the wedding breakfast, anyone under 16 got chicken and chips (yay edible food)
- for the dancing they had loads of silly hats for people to get dressed up
- they had these flip-flops for anyone wearing heels whose feet needed a break
- FREE BAR!!!!!
So erm yeah *awkwardly shuffles out through window*………….
*climbs back through window* Oh yeah and I’m in Strasbourg next week so expect pictures!!!!!!
*quietly leaves through door*