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10 Things to do at School

Hello one and all! I am in a particularly happy mood at the moment (apart from my best friend going all moody on me (I think it’s because I told her she tuned her ukulele wrong, or something like that) and not finishing my Graphics project) this is mainly because I am eating chocolate right now and it releases happy endorphins in your body!

Sorry minor detour here but I need to ask something. I came home from school today and taped to the living room door was a note addressed to me and my sister and it had 2 ten pound notes attached. The note said that this was this month’s pocket-money (we have never had pocket-money before, ever) but we could only take it if we thought we had done enough to deserve it i.e had we walked the dog, kept our rooms tidy, put laundry in the laundry bin and done things without being asked? I know that I am really lazy. I mean really, really lazy, but as┬ámuch as I am lazy I am quite honest. So I didn’t take the money and neither did my sister. Is it just my parents that do this or have you experienced something like this too? Is this guilt tripping or them trying to tell whether we are honest or not? I reckon they’ve been watching too much Supernanny!

Anyhoo… On with the list. 10 Things to do at School! (WARNING: You may seem a little strange if you do this but it is really good fun!)

1. Gallop. You can do this Monty Python style, Miranda style or even Gangnam style (but that’s mainstream)

2. Ask a teacher (in the style of Nathan from Misfits) “If a bear and a shark had a fight, who would win?”

3. Ask endless questions.

4. Start an argument on the existence of God in Religious. Or the morals of euthanasia. It’s guaranteed to waste the lesson and probably make your teacher forget about the homework she was about to give you.

5. Wear a fake moustache. You must act completely normal.

6. Wear an animal mask. This works best if you do this with a group of friends.

7. Corridor racing. My friend Hatty and I invented this. You kneel on the floor and push yourself along with your hands. It also works if you go backwards on your bum. It’s like wheelchair racing without the wheelchair!

8. Play poker. I got kicked out the class for playing Go Fish! The best card game is spoons. Look it up if you don’t know how to play it.

9. “Accidentally” set fire to something in chemistry. Alternatively turn the gas taps on and hold a lit spill to them. CUE RING OF FIRE!!!

10. Run around with no shoes on. It’s fun and you can slide around and I just like doing it. If you can, get a metre stick and poke people as you run around!

Okay. That is my list for today! I hope you enjoy and George before you ask I have done everything on this list except number 9 but Beth knows someone who has. Try these at school it really does make the day more interesting! Please comment what you want the list to be tomorrow as I am running out of ideas!

Bye

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I told you so…

I told you I would write something today! I bet you didn’t believe me did you? Did you…

Anyway I said I would post but I didn’t say it was going to be good! I have no idea what to write about so you will probably end up with some weird ramblings about my day. So…

I drew a portrait last night for my art homework and it turned out quite well. It looks nothing like me but it did only take me 30 minutes. Although you don’t actually know what I look like (unless your name is Beth, Kaitlyn, Elly or George!) as I have never put a picture of me on here, so I could have told you it looked identical to me and you couldn’t have argued! But even though I am a compulsive liar I am being honest today!

That’s what I will talk about… LYING!

I am quite a good liar. I can usually wheedle my way out of situations where I am being blamed for something disasterous! For instance if I happened to get punched in the face… Yeah I was fighting this huge muderer guy that attacked my mother and he had a knife and stuff but I overpowered him with my mint karate skills. In actual fact a lava lamp fell on my face (Elly). Or if I set fire to the chemistry lab (which, let’s face it, I will probably do at some point)… Yeah, ha funny story. I was just mixing some potassium with some other highly reactive chemicals when *random person’s name* kicked me and I accidently knocked the gas tap on and knocked the highly reactive chemical mixture into the gas and then, yeah you know the rest sir.

Mostly I think I lie to make my life seem much better than it actually is like I may say… I POO RAINBOWS!!!!

Okay I have to go now I have rehearsals (not a lie) and I need a wee (that’s a lie)

Byeeeeeee

Follow me on twitter @tabbymilton